What's not to love is that we have lost so many of our dear family and friends in this month. April 15th is especially painful day for me. It is synonymous with tax day, but it is also the day my son was released from his suffering. Several years later, we lost my nephew on the 1st of April, No joke. My brother-in-law's birthday was in April and his untimely death was the catalyst to catapult me into a completely new life. But first I had to go through a long, painful season of rebirth and regrowth.
I'm sure I could find many more parallels if I look for them, but right now the main focus is on my husband's dear best friend Jon, who went into hospice this week. He had been suffering from colon cancer for the past 3 years and it has overtaken his body. We are already grieving, praying, crying, and trying to deal with the inevitable finality that he will be leaving this Earth. We are praying along with this wife that he does accept the Lord Jesus as his Lord and Savior and enters into heaven where his wife Juliet will eventually join him in eternal life. But we know he will go straight to heaven because he's a good person. They are special couple who volunteered with us up at the racetrack and eventually got together in a very happy union. They got married on the same day as our wedding anniversary and we were so happy for them and honored to celebrate with them on that event. We also know because they got together later in life, as we did, that our time on earth is not nearly long enough, and we desperately want more time to spend together. God, Buddha, sacred spirits, a higher power, whatever it is that we believe in and gives us strength, will ultimately get us through and hold our energy forever.
Today on the 11th of April, I am looking for strength and wisdom to stand beside my husband and go through this time of grief. I will be the rock that my husband needs during this time. I know that in addition to losing his friend in current time, his emotions are coming up from all the losses he has suffered, including the loss of his mother when he was a young boy. That dark time is the one that continually haunts his dreams and shaped his future.
But in the end, it is all out of our control. We give it up to God and ask for his forgiveness and his salvation. Amen.
